Parsha Ki Tavo from Rabbanit Yehoshua and how to help ourselves

Likeuti Tefila 45 is a prayer to help us with running and returning וְעָזְרֵנִי לְהִתְפַּלֵּל לְפָנֶיךָ בְּכָל כֹּחִי, שֶׁאַכְנִיס כָּל כֹּחִי בְּדִבּוּרֵי הַתְּפִלָּה וְאוֹצִיא אֶת הַקּוֹל וְהַדִּבּוּר שֶׁל הַתְּפִלָּה בְּכֹחַ גָּדוֹל, עַד שֶׁיִּהְיֶה קוֹלִי פּוֹגֵעַ בְּמֹחִי וְיִהְיֶה נִשְׁמָע לְלִבִּי כְּמוֹ קוֹל רְעָמִים, עַד שֶׁהַלֵּב יִשְׁמַע הֵיטֵב דִּבּוּרֵי הַתְּפִלָּה וְיִתְעוֹרֵר לַעֲבוֹדָתְךָ בֶּאֱמֶת, וְיִהְיוּ נַעֲשִׂים מִקּוֹלִי וְדִבּוּרִי בְּחִינַת רְעָמִים וְזַכֵּנִי שֶׁיִּהְיֶה לִי יִרְאַת שָׁמַיִם בֶּאֱמֶת, עַד שֶׁיִּהְיוּ דְּבָרַי נִשְׁמָעִים לַבְּרִיּוֹת לַעֲבוֹדָתְךָ וּלְיִרְאָתְךָ וְקוֹל תְּפִלָּתֵנוּ יַעֲלֶה לְפָנֶיךָ לְרָצוֹן כְּמוֹ שִׁבְעָה קוֹלוֹת שֶׁאָמַר דָּוִד עַל הַמַּיִם, כְּמוֹ שֶׁכָּתוּב: “קוֹל יְהֹוָה עַל הַמָּיִם אֵל הַכָּבוֹד הִרְעִים יְהֹוָה עַל מַיִם רַבִּים, קוֹל יְהֹוָה בַּכֹּחַ” וְזַכֵּנִי שֶׁיִּתְפַּשֵּׁט עַקְמִימִיּוּת שֶׁבְּלִבִּי, שֶׁלּ ֹא יִהְיֶה בְּלִבִּי שׁוּם עַקְמִימִיּוּת וְעִקְּשׁוּת כְּלָל, “לֵבָב עִקֵּשׁ יָסוּר מִמֶּנִּי רַע ל ֹא אֵדָע”, רַק אֶזְכֶּה לְיֹשֶׁר לֵבָב בֶּאֱמֶת שֶׁיִּהְיֶה לִבִּי יָשָׁר עִם יְהֹוָה תָּמִיד

connecting to Hashem as One
Translations from the derech of Rav Asher Freund and more, including videos on running and returning and the underlying Torah of consciousness and unificiation of Hashem’s Name

17 elul – let us vote for Hashem through our hisbodedus and inner work

Sometimes in the subconscious lurk things from long ago we don’t know are keeping us busy and we think it is now that it is happening…the goal of hisbodedus is to find them and then do exactly this…redirect the Shechina in exile there for good…we hold ourselves captive without hisbodedus.

Vulnerable share… Rabbi Genuth was describing how improper thoughts and urges we never act on have a residual effect and weaken our trust in ourselves and keep us from moving forward. The “test” itself draws our confidence down for just having thought that..and we doubt ourselves. How do we clear this out and regain our innocence and trust to move forward with our goals when we have nagging questions about why we even thought that? The beauty of seeing that Hashem is doing everything and is all loving is that every thought then is eligible for ratzo vshov, with empowerment.

Here are two examples from today that took just a few minutes but so worthwhile for restoring trust in that I really do want to be compassionate like Hashem…taking a moment to do battle with what blocks us from really believing we are sincere is exactly a way to show ourselves and Hashem we are genuinely trying to be like He is, compassionate, because we ARE being compassionate on the shechina trapped in that block.

I share only to show from my brokenness this point…

n hisbodedus this is how the echo feels and I dont want it
tehillim is Dovid HaMelech’s hisbodedus and run and return and saying it helps us even if we never heard of hisbodedus or run and return
experiencing the associated fears to be felt – allowing whatever fears come up to be felt and to be run back to Hashem…afterwards, there is a lot of wind and movement, not sure it is finished… breathed and felt connected to the surrounding light until….
experiencing the associated judgments and condemnations for having shared vulnerably as if that placed me again in that little child trying to fulfill attachment needs healthfully – more associations that surface, repeat by showering compassion – boy it s great to give all of this back –

Recognize we are having an experience with Elokim because He is all there is…no other power.

HAVE compassion on Shechina in exile in our thought…we don’t want to bring His Love to animate this.

Shower it with compassion..i realize this is not addressing what seems like the issue but rather is esoteric, but in reality, showering compassion IS addressing the issue and the manifestation is only an illusion sent to give us the opportunity to ratzo v shov in avodas Hashem…unify His Dovid HaMelech in every tehillim does.

Then do mitzvah, learn, say tehillim, give blessing, do a kindness

The empowerment comes from remembering Hashem is doing everything and is all loving and PRESENT with great love for us, that His Light is palpable and to therefore comprehend we are only being asked to run and return not to fix..He will fix it….we just have to shower compassion upon it.  this is our role, the nefesh elokis that He designs in His Image, to believe in Hashem and in the way He designs us enough to have emunah and trust and therefore in hisbodedus confess and describe where we are having difficulty shining His compassion through. 

The act of having compassion upon the nefesh elokis that He designs, the Shechina in exile, changes us from the material to the spiritual plane…and from there, His Infinite Powers operate through the nefesh elokis that He designed.  we are a channel only.

And just as Hashem loves us unconditionally because He knows our true essence, a nefesh elokis that He designs with special care to be a vessel for His purposes of being revealed in this world, so too may we love each other unconditionally, even if we are falling in the moment.

We each have this potential within us.  Let us not fall into the darkness of the illusion because we don’t remember to have emunah in His design of our soul.  Rather may we immediately remember we are helpless and powerless and describe the chaos to Him .  May we shower compassion upon the shechina in exile within that spot, where we naturally attached to the material because that is His Plan, and now warm and dissolve the bond with the materially formed message so that the shechina in exile may now unify with Hashem’s compassion and return through our actions into the world as new and revealed light.

This is how I am “voting” today.  that Hashem is King, and that I wish to be like Him and shower compassion upon where I am blocked in being compassionate so that I may indeed become a window rather than clunk around looking in a mirror echoing unmet attachment needs

May we win our inner election of compassion over our blocks

I wonder if today is the opportunity to really choose Him as King , that people conider, with Hashem in the field helping us, before Rosh Hashana yom hadin may we be saved and granted a blessed year.

I think if people are struggling that it is important for us to remember Hashem’s 13 attributes of mercy and to really develop emunah that He has placed these into us, He has made us in His Image and therefore totally loves us – He knows about our material challenges because He creates our circumstances and sends us thoughts….what He wants is to know we have emunah in Him as well as in knesset Yisrael, the soul He designs, to complete the way He desires to bring Infinite light into this world so the world is not nullified.  It feels to us like a full contact sport, like we are being dragged over fiery coals to shift from the darknesss to showering compaassion upon the shechina in exile there, but that slight shift is HUGE EMUNAH in Hashem AND in trusting the design and His Purpose. And all we have to do is remember that He is doing everything, that He loves us, that we are helpless and have no control but we are not stopped from doing mitzvahs and then to confess, shower compassion, sincerely mean it, redirect the life force from animating our darkness to the mitzvah and then know we did what He desires.

So please, everyone remember.  Hashem loves us and His Love is built into our soul even if we don’t feel it.  If we don’t feel it, then shower double compassion  upon what is animating our pain because that means that part of the Shechina is just very far away into the dark.  Emunah in Hashem and in the soul He designs that is in us that is flowing love and compassion even though we may not feel it means that we don’t have to understand, we just have to have trust and faith in Hashem and tell Hashem we want Him to be King over what is concealed there and therefore we have compassion upon what is in the blocking painful thing because we don’t want to use free will to put that beautiful light there, but rather to invest it in mitzvahs.  and then do it.  This is recognition/consciousness and then action that puts the shechina adni back to mercy ud k vav k, unifying His Name. We don’t have to undersand. We don’t have to sense what hashem is going to do or think we have control over that because it is an Infinite Process that happens next that a limited being cannot fathom. We are the vessel. And we can be joyous when we have challenges knowing that we have received in our “inbox” an opportunity to release Shechina in exile into the world. Thank you Hashem for life! We are IN!

Please, everyone feel your breath, your heart, your sight, your hearing and understand this is the nefesh elokis utilizing a body made by Hashem but it is from Hashem and HE is doing all of this giving us the enjoyment.  Thank Hashem.  we want to stay by the buffet of compassion He is showering upon us, so let’s chase after what falls to the side, to our power of imagination, and bring awareness of Hashem to it too so it can add to the buffet of life for all of us.  it is up to us.  but He does it.

Somehow I think the election is 13 days before Rosh Hashana so we ponder this in Elul and ready ourselves with clarity for Rosh Hashana that we are IN on being more compassionate like He is and that we want to bring what is trapped in our subconscious to that, sincerely, that we really do want Him and not to remain in our constrictions

May we see that our center of gravity is not inside of us but is Hashem, the life force we are receiving every moment

Let us see things from His View that He is doing everything and that we are dust and ashes, and then we are able to realize that we are here in this world to bring in His Light as a part of Him and His plan, expanding our subjectivity from feeling ourselves to avodas Hashem with deep love and joy

The thoughts here are due to the teachings of the derech of Emes of Rav Asher Freund. If you care to, kindly consider a donation to help us help sick and needy amongst klal yisrael.

anger cravings and fighting with others over our honor cause us to separate ourselves from feeling Hashem is One and His Name is One
Knesset Yisrael – run and return with joy

The beginning of wisdom is fear/awe of Hashem – constructive fear/awe

Many people are walking around with heavy loads. After all the sufferings of the Jewish people, the mental angush shebe mental anguish has taken its toll – each generation reeling from the pain internalized by the previous generation and then suffering its own pain. And yet, here we stand. How can we understand that under all the layers of pain, there exists a pure compassionate neshama that has not been damaged by even one iota? And how can we bring it from where it is buried underneath our emotions and learned experiences?

The nefesh elokis, the divinely created soul, cannot be damaged because it has a function that is Infinite. Only a portion of the soul enters the body. Two levels – chaya and yechida, remain pristine, in a state of emunah and taanug, delighting in Hashem. The neshama, the ruach and the nefesh enter into the realm of the physical, where free will and our inner drive for pleasure confuse things tremendously, diverting us from the joy and simple pleasure of faith.

We have faith in Hashem. Part of that faith must include faith that He knows what He is doing when He designs our soul, that our soul is something through which He may draw His Infinite Light from the tohu and vohu of this world back to Him through our submission of our natural interpretations.

What this means is that, although it might feel like fiery coals when we do it, when we know Hashem is all loving and He is doing everything, the part of our soul that became snared in negativity due to the natural development of the intellect in a body IS PURE, not damaged, and we can tell Hashem that we want to not want that handshake! When we recognize it is He Who is concealed, we pray to Him and tell Him that we want to go above our natural will, that we want to not want the bond with negativity. Shower the force in it with compassion and then tell Hashem that we desire to move that part of our soul from the negativity into a mitzvah that will give His Compassion the voice and expression to be revealed light in this world.

The amygdela is like a heavy barrier that keeps us focused on the negativity, spiraling between lack and feeling the impact on our self-image. However, the truer reality is that Hashem is doing everything, loves us, and is giving us an opportunity to use real free will to have awe in Him and how He has created us to serve as a channel for the hidden sparks in tohu and vohu to return to Him. How?

When we submit our interpretations – our negative messages – knowing that there is no other Power, and we sincerely want to be compassionate as He is, the bond of our soul with negativity erodes and He delivers us from the chaos to calmness.

Awe of Hashem is constructive. The negativity of the zuhamatic projections is NOT awe of Hashem. Hashem is all loving. we can take back the soul that got hooked into negative patterns. Confess, shower the force with compassion and ask to go above our natural state in order to do mitzvahs. move to do the mitzvah. Hold steady as a barrage of negative downward pulls tries to pull the soul back into the despair (so the natural forces can receive nurture from our soul.) Instead, cling to Hashem, love Him, have enough awe and fear to know that we do not want to go with our negativity, despite how powerful it may feel to “win.”

May our recognition of the Shechina in exile within our subconscious give us the objectivity to hold steady and return to Him what is captive, and may it come back into the world through our mitzvahs as a new light.

Thoughts on the 13 of elul, a day of love and the yahrtzeit of the Ben Ish Chai

It is elul and Hashem loves us so much and desires us tremendously and He chases after us to make sure we have challenges so that we find where we are attached to falsehood so we may pray to Him and find it and choose to bring it to Him ratzo vshov, showering compassion upon the Shechina in exile.


My encounter with my lymbic system became activated yesterday and increased into the night …when we are IN IT, even if we know it is our lymbic system, it feels real….like that sign in the wizard of oz…enchanted forest I would turn back if I were you…type reactions, right?

That is flight. remember fight, flight or freeze are the lymbic system instincts when lack or danger presents. And knowing the process to take it through helps but we must do it and realize also that there could be more than one voice, namely the initial challenge plus the messages of doubt that want to undermine our confidence so as to keep its “needle” in the vein of the Shechina in exile, draining our life force.

The more familiar we are with that construct, the better chance we have to wiggle out of its chains through submission and compassion on the Shechina in exile. The natural mind, even with heavenly intentions, may be blind to this fight, flight or freeze response because it is very subconscious. What that means is that we have a tendency to believe those survival instincts and to trust them and associate Hashem with being “on our side” and ourselves as “in the right.”

And that gives us a heter to then move without really turning to the challenge itself. and what is that challenge? The obvious paradox that Hashem is doing everything, that He is all good and loves us and whether it is seemingly good or not good in our eyes, to have the emunah to understand that He alone surrounds and fills all worlds and that there is no other Power and that He is calling upon us to do the work of improving the influx of Infinite Light in the raw elements of earth wind water and fire.

How ?

Recognize it is He and He alone.

Have compassion upon the Shechina that is naturally bound to nature and causing it and us this distress (seething waters, feeling ourselves) because nature conceals the light and is limited.

Strengthen emunah in the truth that Hashem’s light and love are surrounding and filling everything and that we can tell Him how it feels, thereby grinding the nature with our words.

The compassion we then flood it with stimulates Him to open a channel He designs through the nefesh elokis to draw the Infinite light through us back to Him and then into our mitzvah, and He also brings healing and balance. Compassion from us brings that balance, another name for tiferes, which is compassion, balance, harmony. Notice that inside tiferes, the middle three letters are the letters that spell refuah. Healing.

The chaos is calmed.

Strengthening emunah means that when the self image, i am right, survival instinct type messages descend, that we quickly recognize the force as Shechina in exile tied to feeling ourselves, the natural bonding because of tohu and vohu. IT IS NOT US. When we grind the bond through describing how it feels and holding it to our heart and looking past it to recognize Hashem, we are seeking Him out from love and activating compassion which means His attribute in us, and that aligns us with Him, pulling us out. Purge the messages into the light we have strong emunah to know is the true reality.

Tell Him everything and have that awe of how we are helpless with no control but that He is doing everything and then move forward with learning Torah, avoda, chesed and mitzvahs as an alternative expression for the shechina, rather than our painful messages.