Rabbi Alon Moshe Rome has been speaking in Elul and Tishrei on the topic of how the nefesh elokis is here to transform the nefesh behema. Through explaining the spiritual science regarding how tefilla is the channel that does this, Rabbi Rome gives the listener empowerment and emunah that we each have a relationship with Hashem by His Design that cannot be revoked and that potential comes from Him yet our ability to express it depends on our free willed choice and emunah and effort. Please listen and find what is needed to be empowered to nullify the self-consciousness that blocks us from experiencing Hashem’s Divine Love. Instead, recount the exodus from Egypt, the Sinai experience and more in order to viscerally find real Hashem’s constant surrounding and immanent love fiery love for us, and as that begins to pierce our hearts, may it inspire and empower us to go all in to give up the false beliefs that limit us from expressing our true essence, a diversified cosmic emanation of Hashem.
Reb Asher Freund teaches us that our natural thinking banters our soul between despair/lack and arrogance/ego self-consciousness. Reb Asher Freund teaches us to comprehend deeply that we have real free will and emunah to recognize our Creator as the life force animating everything and we use hisbodedus, personal prayer, to form together a mitzvah that will bring all of our life force into the world in a way that will reveal Hashem’s Infinite Light.
The pain that we feel is compelling. It uses hurtful words and denegrates us or other people. We think certain thoughts and we spiral downwards into the dark with judgment and hurt and we feel lost, abandoned, and as if we are ready to be annihilated.
The battle for our hearts is real. How do we fortify ourselves?
Emunah means that we recognize that the only power in the world is Hashem.
He creates an imperfect being, namely Adom, by placing a drop of concealed light from the world of tohu and vohu into the physicality of our existence so that it appears to us as if it is important for us to consider its focus. However, that drop of concealed light from the world of tohu and vohu has been placed into us so that we may repair its inability to come into this world without breaking apart. We are in the world of repair, and for that to happen, Hashem creates teshuva. By placing this self-conscious self-focused determinism within our unconscious, Hashem desires that the nefesh elokis, the soul He gives us that is made in His Image, will choose to serve Him and in so doing bring the animating light from that drop of tohu and vohu into the world, into this world, so that its light may be unified with His Infinite Light and be part of the revelation of compassion in this world.
It is for us to “spot” these moments. We are taught that our avodas Hashem in the moment is whatever it is that Hashem requires of us. Thus, if in a moment we receive a negative impulse, a self-destructive binge message, or a fearful or hurt reaction to an experience of lack, we are actually empowered in that moment to redeem Infinite light from our subconscious.
Realizing that this may be a little esoteric in the moment, let me make it a little more relatable and even enjoyable and most of all hopeful.
The tohu and vohu, gaiva and taiva, the two kelipot that contain the holy sparks contain Infinite Light that we, through our mitzvahs, are able to bring into the world when we have the intention to do so. We are here to be a channel – rusty and corroded as we sometimes feel – of fresh and pure light into the world. We do this through emunah and free willed choice to unify His Name, the surrounding lights, ohr makhif, Elokim with the immanent lights, ohr penimi, Adni. Within each are sparks that our unique soul has been sent here to return, in teshuva, to Him as part of our mission. In so doing, we also heal our hearts.
How does this work?
Let’s say that I find myself feeling hateful or angry. Surely if I am honest, I see that it is because something is lacking in another person or in myself. That lacking is telling me that something that I need is missing and gives me despair and sets off an alarm. My natural thinking then scans to see where the blame belongs. It is at this point, if we want to apply ourselves, that we can catch our reactions. Often it is not until here that we can even sense what is going on. Once we see we are searching to blame, shame, judge or deliver a consequence, we can instead switch the paradigm for healing our hearts and bringing light into the world.
There is a part of us that is feeling a lack. The true reality is that Hashem is doing everything and that we have never been lacking anything for even one second our entire lives because He is One. That feeling remote, we can, indeed, see this is the true reality of the surrounding light and have basic emunah in it.
There is another part of us that is feeling self-conscious about what this means for me, my health, for being in this matter, for how I look. The true reality is that what is filling our image of ourselves is confusion blocking us from remembering that we are tzelem elokim, made in His Image, with a soul that He designs to draw the concealed light in the matter back to Him IF we submit and recognize Him. The layers of defense mechanisms, coping mechanisms, and lifelong beliefs is present within this confusion. Nevertheless, we can have emunah in the true reality that Hashem has not only surrounded us with His Light but is filling us with a soul that He Designs to draw the light back to Him.
We are neither abandoned, nor are we ready to be anniliated. Our love and value are untouchable because He is doing everything.
So what do we do? We are SEETHING!!!
Find the place in the lack that thinks it is lacking and tell Hashem “Hashem, naturally I feel there is a lack here but I have the emunah to know that I am not lacking because You are doing everything and love me and I trust that. I am showering compassion upon the Shechina in exile, the part of my soul, that naturally feels lack here.”
Now find the place in the outrage or anger or fear or judgment that thinks someone or a circumstance is going to hurt your image of yourself or harm your body or reputation. “Hashem naturally I feel that this will detract from my existence, my image, my general well-being and to me it seems as thought it is being withheld from me as a hurt, a damage, a punishment, a revenge, or worse. I have the trust to know that You have designed my soul in a way to bring from the subconscious healing light back into my heart which will not only repair my heart but also bring light into the world when I perform a mitzvah. I am showering compassion upon the Shechina in exile, the part of my soul, that naturally feels it is oppressed and diminished.”
“Please Hashem, take the light from the messages of being oppressed and diminished from the world of gaiva/tohu – a light concealed by Elokim -and draw that light to heal the feeling of lack in my heart from the world of vohu/despair – a light concealed from Adni in my subconscious – for You Hashem are doing everything and love me and I trust in the soul that You have designed and give to me and I wish to serve You by doing the mitzvah of….”
May the deep recognition of Hashem and our obedience to His spiritual laws with love and awe draw forth the Infinite light so that the messages dissolve and in so doing, bring peace to our hearts and light to the world.
A reference page is being compiled with shiurim and articles that are focused directly on nullification, emunah and hisbodidus to help us strengthen emunah so as to understand and withstand the pulls of darkness when doing hisbodedus. The goal is to nullify self-consciousness so as to bring out a clear revelation of the inner being, an image for 2020 , that reveals compassion. We are made in Hashem’s image in order to shine that light into the world..
It is compassionate of Torah to teach us how we are made so that we may utilize our intellect and our life force in concert with Hashem’s vision for us.
Rav Asher Freund clips and a previous article to start….
Sarah Yehudit Schneider, in a book entitled “You are what you hate”, pages 152-153 explains from the book Toldot Yaakov Yosef on Parshat Lech Lecha from Rabbi Yaakov Yosef of Polonoye what the term Shechina means.
It is a basic principle of faith that the whole world is filled by Hashem’s glory and that there is no place void of Divinity. Hashem is One.
“Though Divinity is equally present in every point of time and space, it is not equally revealed through them. When the light, love, oneness and goodness of Hashem is perceptible in a place, we say that the Shechina dwells there, and the place or moment becomes a tabernacle in time or space that holds the manifest glory of Hashem. When the light, love, oneness and goodness of Hashem is concealed in a place, we say the Shechina is in exile, meaning that it is present, but hidden.”
“The Shechina permeates not just the physical layer of creation, but the emotional, mental and spiritual planes as well. The entire spectrum of soul-light enclothed within the space of creation is Shechina…Nothing exists apart from it. And though it is Divine, It infuses both the holy and profane, the virtuous and the wicked. Even evil has a drop of Shechina glow at its core, otherwise it could not endure.”
When in our day we experience something passionately that keeps taking different forms in our mind, we are experiencing a fallen spark – the shechina in exile – a bit of light concealed by coverings which are giving us a fiery experience. When we utilize real free will and exercise our emunah, we remember that what our intellect is experiencing is a spark in need of receiving awareness of Hashem, enlightenment. By realizing we are powerless and not in control and that Hashem has created us as a being that extends into this chaos for the very purpose of drawing light into it, we nullify all of our interpretations in favor of showering compassion upon that fallen spark. Surely we want to be the channel through which it receives light, yet what is pulling our life force is the same darkness that is giving us passionate imaginative fiery negative interpretations.
By showering compassion upon the Shechina in exile in the experience, we recognize Hashem and our role, to be the pipeline through which the light may travel. Why? That pipeline is our very nervous system and when we submit and separate and sweeten by showering compassion and doing battle with the negative downward pulls, we are improving our nervous system to a place of healing – real healing – where our first reactions are more and more in accordance with Torah, kindness, mitzvahs and avodas Hashem. Imagine feeling passionate about that! The body willingly comes to such a state of pleasure from serving Hashem when we repeatedly and consistently nullify our lusts, urges, cravings, negativity, and survival instincts.
Nullifying means shifting our consciousness from self-consciousness to awareness of Hashem and that He is doing everything and to bring that deeper and deeper into the nested thoughts that we have, never to believe anything else, but to forge forward running and returning the koach of anything that stands between our seeing clearly that Hashem is all loving and doing everything.
The reason we are born is to weave eternal garments for ourselves. As wonderful as friends and spouses are, and as welcome as their love and support is, until we take the time in personal hisbodedus to make the connection between awareness of Hashem and the vessel tainted with a fallen spark and do a mitzvah of the Torah so that the light may reach that spark, we have not woven that eternal garment. It is Torah that pulls us out of the coverings over the concealed light, nothing else can. Hashem makes the yetzer hara and gives us the remedy, Torah.
We are souls in a body. The body is neutral. It is up to us to see to it that the body is dominated by the Shechina, not by what is keeping the Shechina in exile. And surely we do not want to add to what is concealing the Shechina, for what we are adding is our own life force we are given to weave eternal garments with. We know we are growing closer to Hashem when our body is more and more responding naturally with Torah and kindness as its source of simcha.
It is well-known that evil is what conceals Hashem’s light. The more layers concealing His Light, the more compassion on the Shechina in exile it is up to us to shower upon the Shechina in exile, along with our prayer that the the light be restored to being revealed light through a mitzvah we do, and asking that the concealing layers fall away.
Each one of us in our individual lives is given these challenges multiple times a day. Often what happens is that we get drawn down, embittered, becoming hopeless. This is an opportunity to shift our identity from that cyclic self-consciousness to empowerment to shower compassion upon the entire thought chain, for there is only Hashem concealed in the vessel of the messages of the thoughts. A thought is a vessel and a soul, just like everything else. WE can recognize that and relate to its pure soul and perform the mitzvahs and live according to Torah that tells us what is permitted to us and what is not. Then Hashem absorbs that thought’s soul and the vessel of the thought dissolves and our mind and heart heal.
May we realize that our potential relationship with Hashem is as a created soul in the raw material of the body to Hashem the Soul of the world, and when we do, then He takes care of our bodily wants, urges and needs in a way that heals and brings simcha and closeness with Him in the manner in which He intends, a love relationship with Him.
You are not the triggered emotion or your bodily reaction although these are the outcomes of our challenge to draw forth the sparks that feel viscerally real. This place is the stage for our choice..shall we believe the messages or redeem the shechina in exile? Obviously if we identify with the message, we add our life force into the heap and get more and more spiraled between lack and self-consciousness.with emunah that all there is in the world us Hashem Who is doing everything, we can instead choose to emulate His Compassion virtually placing a counter magnet over the soul trapped in us, in the other, in the nature itself. When we do that, and provide a new garment for It through a mutzvah, we release the Shechina that agrees to be bound by nature from Its vow. He then moves all the life force to Him and in the void, restores revealed compassion.
We are this rusty pipe that can move clear water.
By strengthening ourselves in emunah, we step into the empowerment of will Hashem has given us to heal ourselves from our natural bond with nature and to also impact the physical world
If you take one strong magnet and place it on metal…
If you take a second magnet (even one that isn’t as powerful) and put it on top of the first one, the first one will break away from its host with maybe 1/5 the effort. Then the two magnets can be pulled apart with less effort than pulling that first one off would have been.
When we recognize Hashem is doing everything and that He is all love and WE have compassion upon the Shechina that agrees to be concealed by nature so that we have real free will, that compassion creates a second magnet upon the natural bond, and this is our avodas Hashem. From our mind and heart, we can unify on love for Hashem and will for our soul to be unified not with nature but with Him.
Vulnerable share in a different direction – sometimes we cannot hold space, it must be halachically alright.
vulnerable teshuva share…I made an error in judgment I did not fully understand the halacha of something before I said I wanted to send something. I did ask and then found out and had to re-garment the way I followed through, which I did. I was “proud” of myself for recovering and hoping that there would be smoothness and it would bring happiness, Today, I fell and landed on my right side, The upper ribs are bruised and I have a slight whiplash nothing terrible. Then while out for a chol hamoed trip, I needed to find a rest room for my stomach issues. the first place I stopped, a gas station, their rest room was out of order. I then proceeded to a regular grocery store only to find them closed in the middle of the day due to a water main break. things were getting quite urgent and eventually I found a mall with a department store. there were two ladies who I asked if they knew the store well enough to tell me where the rest rooms were and they did. Baruch Hashem. then I re-joined the cho hamoed trip already in progress. however, i had plenty of time, with an aching side and a hurting neck and a constricted activity due to having to take care of basic bodily needs to realize that we are indeed just a clump and nothing more. The nefesh elokis is a gift but we indeed are a clump that is helpless and not in control. when we returned home, I got an email from the person to whom I sent something with a request that acccording to halacha I was not permitted to respond to…it was for the same reason that the original giving had to be re-formatted. My first reaction was to respond to the request, but i was very in touch with this clump image and realized immediately the error, and so I forwarded the email to someone else instead of responding to it. I then began to realize that the feelings i had were in need of teshuva, for these are Hashem’s laws and I am a clump here to follow the laws, not to assuage feelings of others who violate the Torah and seek my “approval.” I deleted the email and checked the other email account and to my shock the forwarded email never arrived. I wanted to delete it so that no further chance of disobeying Hashem by accident or indirectly would take place. But Hashem had already taken care of that. I hurt my rib and got a long road to the bathroom to help me be in the correct frame of mind to not make heterim for myself that are not mine to make. May Hashem’s Name be known throughout the world for a loving, and patient Father who teaches us with love and accepts our teshuva when we are sincere.
In Parsha Haazinu, Devarim 32:46 and 47, It says “He (Moshe) said to them, “apply your hearts to all the words that I testify against you today, with which you are to instruct your children, to be careful to perform all the words of this Torah, for it is not an empty thing for you, for it is your life, and through this matter shall you prolong your days on the Land to which you cross the Jordan to possess it.”
The Sfas Emes on Parshas Behochesai in 5644 writes that thinking about the mitzvos is greater than the mitzvah itself, because the correction of the soul comes from thinking a lot and desiring to serve Hashem.
In Rectifying the Ego, a 16 shiur two year course through Torat haNefesh, Rabbi Moshe Genuth teaches about having compassion on the Shechina in exile. This term, the Shechina in exile, is also seen in the prayer before kol nidre from the zohar regarding the releasing of oaths, It speaks about releasing the Shechina in exile from its oath to abide by nature. It explains that if all else fails, go with pleadings with thirteen attributes of compassion, as modeled for us by Moshe Rebbeinu.
In this reading from the Zohar we learn that the Shechina agrees to be in exile, concealed, and abides by the laws of nature. Rabbi Genuth explains in commentaries on Vayakeil from the Lubavitcher Rebbe that the Shechina in exile, a prisoner in nature by His Own designation, cannot free Himself and therefore designates the Kohen Gadol once a year to come into the Holy of Holies and free the Shechina from the aveiras of the Jewish Peop\e https://youtu.be/ebMdAf_ytlk Drushim of Yom Kippur Maimer – the Shabbos of Shabbosos given over by Rabbi Moshe Genuth
https://youtu.be/7fYRUqHpbrA The paradox of bringing something Infinite into this world through the effort to nullify the ego
https://youtu.be/hmy79-eBc0Y Drushim Yom Kippur Maimer weaving time into garments commandments Rabbi Moshe Genuth
Rabbi Rome in teaching about Rosh Hashana Shofar blowing explains how there is light within us that comes into the world into the body that immediately bonds with the physical world. This light is intended to bond with the light from the vav of Hashem’s Name. The Shofar breaks that light’s bond with the natural so that it turns instead to the light from the vav, Zeir Anpin and bonds with that, thereby completing the flow of Infinite Light into the creation.
Rabb Asher Freund teaches that our natural thinking is attracted to the messages offered by our subconscious thinking, an intellect that is biased towards the body due to developing within time and space at a very early age.
The personality of a person is largely formed by the age of 2, during the sensori-motor development, as a baby learns about its environment and how to move around. Surely we can see that it is not true that everything we need to know we learn by two, except that emotionally, until the age of 5, is when our basic personality is formed. After that, it is a matter of fine tuning. Changes after that require strength of will, not just teaching.
And thus, built into our subconscious are all the impressions, rightly or wrongly, that form when our young mind is developing.
The soul that is placed into a body is its life force. It comes into a body with a young brain and is placed in dependent situations that to a helpless child can be terrifying. As a child’s will develops, when that child experiences a lack of something the child wants, the basic reptilian brain reaction is seen. This is called the terrible two’s but is really revealing to us our core initial reactions, our limbic system, that is connected to our body’s experience of what is happening.
In that initial moment of lack, there is fear, doubt, accusation, an expression of self-defense that is violent or hurtful discharge of the body’s survival instinct when feeling threatened.
Slowing this down, something appears lacking to the will. There is a natural will and there is a message that something is lacking and that there is danger. That is despair. Then there is an interpretation regarding how we feel about this based on what it means for me that my will is not being fulfilled and therefore this message of despair needs to be addressed. The interpretation messages are from our feeling ourselves and our concern for our image or our lives. These messages then feed the despairing messages and augment the lack of what is our will. Our soul gets trapped between these two types of thoughts and we give more and more of our life force to such a pattern. However, it does not help because these thoughts are taking place within the realm of the shell over our essential self, the soul. There are no solutions there because Hashem is doing everything and we simply cannot take for our will what it initially wants.
Thus, there is the initial want and then there is the followup which is the thought pattern into which our soul naturally follows due to being in an immature mind. And our soul enlivens this thought pattern because Hashem agrees to be in exile there, giving us real free will. As we grow older, and we learn Torah, we can come to see that the Torah tells us to react differently with commandments such as do not hate or bear a grudge, love and fear Hashem, do not take revenge, yet we are “invested” in our subconscious thought pattern because the soul that Hashem has given us, the Shechina in exile, is enlivening the thought pattern in our brain and we make the mistake of thinking that these coping mechanisms and unrectified characteristics are who we are.
Rather, these are the challenges that well up within us that we are here to use free will to absorb back our soul, the Shechina in exile within these thoughts that is causing the pain to feel so alive and causing us to experience emotions that are being projected onto the present as if the past were happening as it did when these willful moments were first turned into thought patterns.
Our interpretations of the frustrated will and what that means for our self image formed when we were too young to know anything about Hashem. This is by design because Hashem desires a being whose nervous system is rooted in the tohu and vohu, the void and darkness, with which He conceals the Infinite Light that cannot otherwise come into the world. By design, our free will with emunah and our nefesh elokis are the needle and thread that bring the Infinite Ligh through the blanket of tohu and vohu into our mind and heart and then into this world through our speech and deeds. This is how the yetzer hara is very good, for it is His Design on how to have a world with Infinite Light through an imperfect people who in the process earn their perfection and weave eternal garments out of the mitzvahs.
As we learn about Hashem and develop emunah and bitachon, we begin to understand that Hashem is doing everything and that He loves us and that WE are our own Kohen Gadol that must go into our Holy of Holies, the mind/heart pairing, and free the Shechina in exile, our soul, from the prison of our subconscious impressions and possibly life long coping mechanisms and thought patterns or even thought disorders.
How do we separate that initial flow of light from the messages with which it is bonded? If we want to boil water, we put water in a pot and turn on the heat. If we want to break a mental bond, we hold the message, the vessel, with the light, our soul and we shower the soul with compassion on it so that the compassion breaks the bond between the message that is negative and the soul that is pure compassion yet animating it due to its being imprisoned there. Our compassion on that shechina in exile is an expression of the flame from Yaakov Aveinu, who balanced chesed and gevurah with harmony and compassion. It is within us even if we don’t realize it and when we have emunah and use real free will to shower compassion on the shechina in exile in our thoughts. It is because we recognize our creator and we simply do not want any more of our life force, our soul, our time line, to flow towards such a thought pattern. We simply do not want it. Even though we are thinking it and our subconscious “wants” it, we cry out to Hashem that we do not want it, that we want our soul to be more like He is so that we can bring that shechina, which is compassion, into the world as the intention for learning Torah, praying, doing chesed, or doing mitzvahs. Crying out to Hashem with this as our truth in our heart is our effort. By speaking it, we break the bond. This is submission, in the Baal Shem Tov’s submission, separation and sweetening model.
Once broken, the compassion flows back to its Source, Hashem, because Hashem draws it back to Him through our nefesh elokis. This is ratzo, our will to nullify everything that seems to us to be the reality that we know is NOT what we want. We hold steady as we move towards Hashem, running and not getting pulled by the windy forces that are our natural messages trying to pull us back into the darkness of the despair and arrogance concerns. This is separation, and it feels like being dragged over fiery coals. It takes emunah and compassion on our own soul, the Shechina in exile, and real free will to know that we want to not want any of those messages and that we recognize Hashem is One and that we are a part of Him and desire to connect through Torah, avoda, chesed and mitzvahs. Our sincerity and our will guide us through the emotional storm.
Hashem then brings that compassion, our soul, back to us through shov returning it to our hearts without the message and at that moment, His Name Havaya and Adni are unified and we are able to bring that unified light into the world through the performance of a mtizvah. We have been mesiras nefesh our “first born child” namely our ego. As we take an action, this is sweetening.
We have nullified our ego. What this means is that we recognize that our physicality is a small clump of physical material that is expanded and alive by a nefesh elokis that is made in His Image and that He is doing everything. He gives us real free will to mistakenly take credit for our successes and to think that we are in control. These are two major reasons why nullifying is so hard, and these false beliefs are labeled as arrogance, even though they feel so normal and necessary.
So what is the difference between arrogance and self? Self becomes a transparency of being that reflects the nefesh elokis and gives voice and expression to Hashem’s will through acts of learning Torah, praying and blessing, acts of chesed and mitzvahs. Being able to see that we are a clump is the first step in the process of nullifying the painful reactions we have and showering compassion upon the shechina in exile within them. These are deep places in our hearts. Yet when we submit in such a way and we realize we are helpless clumps that are not in control and we move forward to do good according to His Will, Hashem draws back to Him what is imprisoned within us and restores our soul to our hearts with healing and great simcha. There is life after ego pleasure and it is called joy.
We are Yisroel, Jacob’s ladder, across which the angels come between heaven and earth through our perceptions to our brains through our hearts and bodies and emunah and prayers through our nefesh elokis and back again to our mind and heart and into our deeds.
May we expand our vision of who we really are, souls in a body, so that our lives become meaningful and our hearts become joyous as we usher new light into the world.
When in pain, we are able to continue to do mitzvahs and do good. When we are humiliated, we are able to nullify the despair and arrogance winds and truly see with joy the abilities of a clump to serve Hashem as one with Him.
Eventually, we come to understand at that initial experience of our will not happening to simply say thank you and NOT follow the limbic system’s messages at all but rather by recognizing lovingly our patterns, to simply hold steady with emunah and thank you so that we remain focused on recognizing the opportunity to bring our lifeline, our soul, the Shechina in exile from its prison of darkness into the mitzvah of Hodu lHallel, ein od milvado consciousness, with a full heart.
Knowing that this effort will produce a flow of inner simcha is ok..we r doing it from love for Him with compassion on the shechina in exile but it is ok to know that the pain will dissolve and we will feel healed and then can reveal our true essence, His Compassion.
Update: I counted 3 times today that going to nothing and doing a mitzvah kept calm inside and out, even while I watched the projections of others as they became triggered and couldnsee what irritated them. Instead of feeling hurt or defensive, it became a matter of praying for them to be able to restore their calm.
The “nothing” nullified place is one of trembling but knowing it is simchadik to obey.
And then act on the matter thru avodas Hashem
It is not about the circumstance…the circumstance is happening because it is an opportunity to do teshuva (no guilt, it is from our earliest formation just for being returned) and release the shechina in exile into avodas Hashem
Start here with Devorah Yaffa Singer Foundations of Emunah
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLX57rFH1LLqvgvrUc40AvF2pKyUsUZSTF I highly recommend that people begin to listen to Devorah Yaffa Singer’s Lights of Emunah – these foundational shiurim are offered for free. There are about 26 more, for which Devorah Yaffa gives to those who register 4 a month along with an hour of coaching on emunah. This series is experiential understanding of Hashem and I highly recommend it…Devorah Yaffa is delightful and the shiurim are well sourced in Torah and it is quite enjoyable.
And here with Rabbi Moshe Weinberger shiurim on the Bilvavi’s Da es midosecha, getting to know your middos
As Yom Kippur rapidly approaches, I am filled with great hope for 5780. The reason is because I am hearing from many speakers of many varieties essential consciousness and the value of pursuing it.
Inner consciousness, daas, is integrated understanding of the Torah. What I have learned this year is that our feelings for our lives are coming from our experiences with the physical world. Although there is great joy and comfort from this beautiful world, Hashem did not create us solely for the enjoyment of this world because He also wants us to enjoy our eternity. Thus, life challenges abound so that we may be mesiras nefesh what feels to us like our lives in favor of digging our will into an internal place where our hearts and His Compassion merge.
It may feel like we are giving up everything we know. But that is only because we have yet to experientially know something – a great pleasure- that can only be attained through emunah and nullification. That great pleasure is the joy of being one with Hashem in doing His Will. To the part of us that rather eat sleep vacation and the like, this may sound very distant. The reason it is distant is because the topic of development of inner consciousness is not directly taught.
However, the reason for my hopefulness is that I am hearing people trying to teach this. And not just as a nicety to help us balance our existence within physical reality, but rather as the core of our existence, the reason we are alive. Our pursuit of inner consciousness and making connection with Hashem then is what brings about our physical comforts as well, for when we make His Will ours, He makes our needs and wants His Will and delivers them to us in amazing ways.
Remember, Hashem is doing everything. There is No Other Power. What we experience as ourselves are the tough skin we developed because our minds developed in a physical world before it had any comprehension of what a soul is or who Hashem is, when we were 0 to 2 years old. Did you know that most of the personality is formed by the age of 2? Isn’t that a tip off to how Hashem has designed the world? He desires us to first become attached to nature so that our lofty soul connected to Him has an attachment to this world, its feet on the earth, so that the nefesh elokis is a ladder across which the holy sparks may flow from our physicality and then become revealed compassion through our actions, speech and thoughts.
In the moment when we fall, that is the moment for emunah.
In the moment when we need that emunah, we are in the dark, helpless and not in control with waves of emotions from our subconsious surfacing. Confess our arrogance in continuing to believe what we learned when young about cause and effect being in our hands. Admit that Hashem Alone is the primary cause and ask Him for forgiveness. Tell Him we do not want our hateful and powerful survival instincts to be the motivation for our actions. In the moment when those waves are attempting to draw our thinking, we run to Hashem with confidence, with total trust that our life force merely is in need of connecting back to Him. We got momentarily disconnected by the natural laws that appear to rin the world but that only conceal His Omnipotence. Shall we pursue solutions of disconnection or shall we drop that approach in favor of Torah – do a mitzvah, learn Torah, pray, do a chesed? The moment we use real free will and have compassion upon our soul, the life force that is constantly connected to Hashem, that is by virtue of being in a body with a limbic system also connected to nature, we are available to Hashem as that channel through which He may draw BACK TO Him Infinite light feom the challenge and return it as revealed light dispelling the darknl nTural message. The very emotions surfacing from our subconscious are the fuel for igniting (from our real free will to rise above our natural reactions out of love for Hashem) a process that Hashem then does by flowing Infinite light from those subconscious messages into the performance of mitzvahs.
And thus, after hearing for myself so much Torah during elul and the 10 days, I am heartened because I SEE THAT EVERYONE IS SAYING THE SAME THING. Now the topic is how to learn about inner consciousness and how to bring it into our homes and to our children so that we may all cling to Him with joy and live as He designs us to live, in a Utopia, with His Light revealed.
It is up to US. We are the channel. Let us find the tools to grow into the inner penimius of Torah.
Notes from Rabbi Tatz clip
Teshuva is necessary for actions and qualities of character, for what you have become.
You can be a well behaved person with a problematic personality. If we have terrible self esteem, anger, jealousy, or full of lustful thoughts, but we don’t act upon it, for all eternity we are considered that problematic person. We don’t have to do teshuva for actions but we live as that problematic distorted individual.
Our spiritual growth is stunted and problematic. We are not focused on the internal dimension. We hide and suppress inner consciousness, daas. Instead we worship technical knowledge and are skeptical about daas, where emunah begins.
Inner knowledge is much more important than external knowledge. We relate with ourselves, others, and Hashem. The most important is our relationship with ourself. If we are not worth anything to ourselves, we are not worth much to others or Hashem. The real development of self is conquering ego.
If we live alone on a desert island and never see anyone else, there is work to be done. It is not a wasted life. And in some ways this inner sacred space of consciousness needs to be so solid and real that we take comfort and solace in our own inner being. Gedolim live within their relationship with Hashem. It is a private world of richness.
Our world is full of extraneous senses.
Did anyone ever talk about inner consciousness in your education? That is where emunah begins and where we live as a person.
That, daas, our relationship with ourselves, is where it starts, then extend to others and Hashem.
Be worth something in your essence. Be ready to give your soul back as pure as it was given.
Your thoughts are your inner life. There are thoughts welling up from the inner self, from the lower world. Those are yetzer and those are your challenges, what do you do with them?
Instead of indulging in them, which fills the mind with unholy things that wastes time, express them in a kosher way. But higher thoughts that we do build ourselves on, Torah learning, that is who you actually are.
The Arizal could look at someone’s face and see inside. Reb Chaim Vital said one night he said a word he was not supposed to say, a kabbalistic external shell . the next morning the Arizal said why did you say that?
It has not been taught because it has to be taught in a certain type of silence. If you don’t have daas you don’t have anything.
People act cruelly when they don’t know who they are. There are some mental illnesses that also can cut someone off from daas.
Every aspect of the lower self has a kosher channel to be driven into. Negative thoughts that are not necessary, we are culpable for the thought. Thoughts well up from what we see in the world, so we can also guard ourselves by not exposing ourselves.
When you work on yourself you are also giving …to yourself.
Modern day meditation is preparation of tefilla, ascend out of your body until your body is irrelevant.
To bring from the connection to this world is something that takes time.
We cannot give to Hashem’s essence but we can give to His Name as it manifests.
Gematria from Rabbi Genuth clips – for full shiur join Patreon here https://www.facebook.com/moshegen/videos/10156626326626367/?epa=SEARCH_BOX
Yeish bitachon and shechina both have gematria 385
The ray of confidence emerges from the circle of faith.