We are here to extract and uplift “holy sparks” that fell into the world when Adom ate from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. What does this feel like, and what does it mean?
When we are experiencing something painful, our analysis is to judge what is happening so that we may work ourselves back to the truth. What the above classes teach is that the truth in the world of judgment IS NOT going to connect us to Hashem necessarily. An additional step is needed, a step that actually brings blessing.
Listen to Rabbi Rome describe how the incense ingredient myrr is made. When we remain in a state of judgment, it is because we have not distilled the “myrr” from the circumstances. Again, the circumstances are not in our control. We have no control over circumstances whatsoever. If so, why would we have to endure the suffering of a nervous system that perceives and experiences pain and loss?
This is the design, the way Hashem places our spiritual being in contact with the four root elements of the world, water, fire, wind and earth, in order for us to infuse it with loving intention.. Listen to Rabbi Ari Goldwag on Parshas Tzav – Infuse Physical with Spiritual
Let’s put this all together.
We have a pain, an anxiety, a loss, a suffering. Chas v’shalom, no one should have any more. Our experience of it is coming through our perceptions, our body, which has an integrated understanding of what is causing the matter and what is not in line with what we think is just and good. We form a judgment. Where are we? We are in an integrated understanding of thinking we know what is good and what is evil. We think that our evaluation is better than Hashem’s. Are you with me?
So what happens? We feel angry. We do things that hurt others with words or actions believing we are acting justly and in self-defense.
What are we being asked to do by Hashem instead?
Thank Hashem for the opportunity of life to bring a holy spark that has fallen into the darkness into the world as light by infusing it with our intention to use it for compassion. Strengthen ourselves in our emunah and love for Hashem and trust in Him, with awe that He is right here, right now, loving us and with us, asking us to do a G-d-like action of going above our will to do His Will of raising the sparks and making it possible for Him to be seen in the natural world. Embrace it.
Tell Hashem that we realize He has sent this to give us the opportunity to serve Him and that we want to. Tell Him we love Him. Tell Him we know that at this very moment, despite how it feels, we know that it is only His Love that exists and fills all things and that we are grateful and want very much to bring His Love into visibility in this world. Tell Him that we need His help because our limited analysis and understanding, it feels like we are …..be detailed. Put each thought into the blanket of love for Hashem and knowing He sends only Love. Ask that the holy spark that is trapped in our limited pained judgmental integrated understanding, through our love and awe, be returned to Him, that we wish to serve Him. Ask that He transfer a healing or an insight into our spiritual being so that we may reveal His Love with our speech and deeds.
We may go up and down in feeling the pain as we do this, but stay focused on serving Hashem by uplifting the holy spark animating our pain or suffering, understanding we are infusing emunah and love for Hashem to balance an impurity in fire, wind water or earth. Especially if we get a strong message of judgment, be aware that in that is a holy spark of daas of the kelipa – Amalek.
We are not in charge of outcomes. We are not in charge of circumstances. Having a body IS our life. Thank Hashem for our lives and for the opportunity to squeeze from our judgments that holy spark so that it can break out of the kelipa and into the world through our hearts, speech and deeds. We desire to be strong vessels and channels to serve Him. In so doing, we build our eternal identity. And from that holy spark, healing comes. We don’t know what that healing will look like, but we trust that, just as medicine is extracted from certain plants, that holy spark causing us distress in our judgments holds an insight or an answer to calm and heal.
We are here to balance the impurities in water, fire, wind and earth through our intention to do so. The conclusions we draw based on limited consciousness are filled with falseness. It is time to become resistant to falseness and develop ourselves according to Hashem’s design and will.