Understand the true spiritual essence of man – compassion

Circumcise your heart

Send away the mother bird and keep the eggs for yourself

Nullify material and physical reality

What does all this refer to? 

We have a basic neurological response for survival.  Unfortunately, we respond from our survival instincts on matters that are not truly a threat to our survival.  This is because of the threatening ways these matters appear to us – absent emunah in Hashem- becausr what we naturally know does not calibrate what is spiritually true – that our survival depends on Him.  Life triggers us and we feel pain, and without this understanding of survival being in Hashem’s hands, we seek to place the blame on the externalities we experience. We don’t know where else to look or how to look.

That said, we are not inadequate because of this!  That is crucial to hear.  Why?  The reason is that we hear it in a threatening way ONLY because of the one true inadequacy, which is that no matter what we do, we can never be as great or as compassionate or as powerful as Hashem. And that inadequacy is so very hidden from us that it takes emunah and Torah learning and consistent effort over time striving to become closer to Hashem to begin to understand enough to pause and develop intelligence for a free willed choice that rises above the natural reaction. It is not a natural intelligence, by design. To start to develop our intelligence striving for spiritual truth, imagine the pain that Adom and Chava had in seeing how great Hashem is. Their yearning to be something they could never attain left them with a feeling of inadequacy and an unfulfilled longing to be Hashem, a Creator.  And they ate from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, and the confusion began.

That said, it is not their fault that the confusion began!  Hashem creates man and by making a creation that can recognize Hashem, feeling inadequate is reasonable.  Hashem knew this would happen and that Adom would eat, thinking he was doing avodas Hashem to prove his love for Hashem and make kiddush Hashem in the world.  Hashem created Adom with  this flaw so that mankind has a role in actually wielding a G-d like force, free will, along with creative speech, to make choices that help create the world, as we will do tonight for 48 hours. Although Adom is responsible for eating, he had no way to know that Hashem would change the flow of negative energy, making it internal rather than external to mankind, creating such confusion of mind within us – the natural reaction of sad, mad, bad that draws our intellect to the inclination to do something hurtful feels like the “real me.”  But it is not.

When we crown Hashem King, we are recognizing that we are a spark of energy, consciousness, ensconced in material and physical reality called a body and a world that is OUR LIFE, totally dependent upon Hashem for every breath, every penny, and every intelligent understanding. Our material body and reality are the wick that gets consumed as we draw through our free will and prayerful words a transfer of divine creative energy to rectification.

With this meta-consciousness, we realize both the true spiritual reality of being a spark of energy from Hashem along with the humbling reality of being completely powerless, with natural tendencies hooked into an inclination that wants to defend itself with hurtful and powerful sounding blows.  With consciousness comes will.  And when we sincerely will to serve Hashem, from love for Hashem and understanding of the design, we grow to see that we become truly powerfully impactful when we choose to be involved with bringing His Compassion to the world. Hashem is the only Power!

We want to be close to Hashem, by being more and more like Him. By being able to express His Compassion and restraining from the expression of our material and physical urges, we are making a choice to NOT direct divine creativity trapped in falsehood into speech and deeds that hurt, cause maklokes, pain, insult, slander and harm  Through our real free will, we often listen to falsehoods regarding our inadequacy and our survival and these trigger our survival instincts and we take actions or say something which conceals divine creative energy within our responses that animate harm or damage in the world.  We may even think that what we are doing is necessary and right for our own survival.

Most of us do not have awareness of how to break free of the emotional pain we experience to rectify divine creative energy.  This is because the real pain, of not being Hashem, has been kidnapped by the material and physical presenting world that has perhaps filled our lives with blame, shame, rejection, insult and more to the extent that we have come to believe something untrue about ourselves. These untruths mesmerize us because the world is a real physical world and we have a real mortal life.  We feel threatened, insulted, angry, afraid, endangered.  There are inherent falsehoods in these emotions due to that kidnapped feeling of inadequacy in not being Hashem that is now trying to find a place to “blame” the external reality, or others, or ourselves.

We have forgotten that we are a spark of energy from Hashem that is not able to be blemished or diminished.  We have forgotten that our only inadequacy is not being able to be Hashem.  And we have forgotten that the purpose of being in this world with real free will and the creative power of speech is so that we CAN make a Gdlike choice which INNOCULATES US from the pain of realizing that we are not Hashem because we will have conducted ourselves with a creative divine ability to form our eternal identity.

Please remember, now and always, that the deceiving messages we get about ourselves that block us from feeling Hashem’s constant love and mercy, are trapping our holiness into the material and physical world and the goals of darkness. Please know they are deceptive but full of potent spiritual energy that we may corral using free will and personal prayer to lift ourselves from its grip.  The escalator is teshuva. With emunah.  With love for Hashem.  With trust that all we have to do is try to will all the spiritual content back to Hashem and He brings it all back to Him, reconstitutes it by removing the dross, and gives it back to us.

This is circumcising our hearts.

This is sending away the mother bird and keeping the eggs for ourselves.

This is nullifying the material and physical reality.

And when we feel the clarity and simcha, we continue to be aided to make more and more choices towards true avodas Hashem.

Part of that includes understanding how everyone is struggling with the same inner choices.  We see how the struggle can often elude us, or take time.  We can be merciful like Hashem, understanding how reasonable it is for others to be expressing their experiences with damaging messages and being compassionate and untouched by their struggle.  We can be safe people to each other.  We do not have to “fight fire with fire.”  We do not have to assert personal power if someone is struggling.  Why?  Because our survival depends on Hashem alone.  There is no real danger.  And there is surely no danger in being compassionate.  If there is real danger, we have an obligation to remove ourselves from peril, especially because we have blemishes. We may need a way to release the emotions generated by the falsehoods in a way that will help us regulate again to avodas Hashem.  It is human and normal to have emotions of this type. It takes will and love for Hashem  to find ways of releasing the hidden divine energy within our falsehoods so that the very concealed energy may strengthen  consciousness and our ability to reveal compassion.  When we have emesdik clarity regarding our true Source of safety,  telling Hashem and releasing our pain to Hashem and asking to be able to transform it into an act that reveals a bit of compassion might serve Hashem profoundly.

“litmus test” for spotting falsehoods in our thinking
The struggle to strive for truth and choose avodas Hashem
Reflections on Teshuva, Rosh Hashana, and Parshas Nitzavim – it is up to us – time to ask

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