We are born into this world with two fundamental defects, areas we are lacking.
Firstly, although we are made in Hashem’s Image, we are not and cannot be Hashem. Hashem has all the value, He is Hashem, and we are not. Our value, then comes only from recognizing He is the only value and reflecting His Merciful Attributes through our hearts to our speech and deeds.
Secondly, although we all feel love and want love and give love, we are not the Source of Love. Nor do we readily understand that our ability to be involved with love at all is because Hashem has created love. Hashem creates love. It is His root attribute, lovingkindness, and His Lovingkindness fills all the Creation, including all the formations and characteristics which come forth from His 13 attributes of Mercy, rooted in the tip of the yud of His Name. While we long for love and for others to love, we are really involving ourselves with something that essentially exists because of Hashem’s creation of love as we know it. Yet we are not clear at all times that He, Hashem, is all loving and that His Love is contained in everything in our lives. We have the experience of love because Hashem has created love! We are inherently inclined by our constricted perceptions to overlook this important detail regarding the ability to love and where real love originates. His Love is at all times present, yet we do not feel it. Yearning at all times for love, we mistakenly look to the external world for a solution. The solution lies in remembering and reconnecting to the Creator of Love, the Source of Lovingkindness.
How do these two lackings affect our lives?
In every single moment, we are being stimulated by a world that is meeting up with unconscious impulses stemming from these two lacks. We do not see this as the source of our pain. Instead we see our imagination drawing images of why we are feeling insulted, angry, hurt, disappointed, defensive and more.
We attempt to resolve the perceived threats from the external material world that are being played out because of our true lackings in the area of value and awareness of being loved. What if instead of causing all the blaming and shaming that we do, we instead return all our thinking to the truth.
Yes, I am not Hashem and yes I am not consciously aware and emotionally enveloped in a feeling of Hashem’s love. These two lacks are pulling me towards imagination and stories that are damaging and hurtful to me and to others and I do not want these false ideas. Instead, I just want, in the same vessel of my mind that wants to draw such negative images, to reflect the truth, that You Hashem are the only Being with value and therefore I just want You and to reflect You. And I love You and in so doing, I am beseeching that I be connected once again to Your love, by involving myself with the creation Love that You have given to us from Your root.
Here are all the images I wish to let go of as false and limiting and keeping me from finding value in reflecting You and from experiencing love by generating Your creation love in my heart, love for You. Please infuse my mind with Your love and light. I wish to bring it into my heart and speech.
The fact that this may make no logical sense to the part of us that wishes to respond in terms of time and space IS why emunah, a power of the soul, is needed. Our animalistic side will tell us we are foolish and suggest its natural solutions that appear more practical.
With emunah, when we have faith and trust and confidence that Hashem is the only Being that actually exists, that He fills all the world, is All Powerful, Is All Present, and All Loving, we can “walk into the Red Sea” on a personal level. We can see our stormy waters, remember why the waves are high – the two true areas we are lacking – and how the way the animal soul and our natural logical mind uses imagination to discern the “cause” in the temporal world. Understanding why the waves are high and how our imagination gets hijacked gives us a handle to work ourselves back from heading into darkness. When we understand these two real lackings and how our being is constructed, we can be in the bleachers and readily turn back towards holiness and resolving our pain by reflecting Hashem’s value and involving ourselves with His creation love. In this way, we actually make an effort to resolve the two areas of true lack that are generating our pain. From there, we may take an action that will reflect Him into this world.
These two areas are built into the unconscious of every person alive. We may not become aware of it.
The stories of the Torah are replete with examples of what happens because people attempt to resolve these two lackings in a different way. An obvious story is the Golden Calf and the murdur of Hur, Miriam’s son. That voice that wants to draw us close to Hashem is overrun by the logical and compelling thinking of the designer of evil, telling us that some other solution besides emunah and bitachon is needed.
What does it take to activate our emunah? We need the confidence that we are created with two lackings so that we may do the work of creating our own perfection by asking Hashem to help us. It may feel to us as though a stormy sea is in front of us and that we had better turn back. Or that walking into it will mean our doom. But that is exactly NOT the case when we have confidence that absolutely everything is love from Hashem, filled with His lovingkindness, awaiting us to peel off the presenting nature and get credit for elevating that material substance by infusing it with our emunah and bitachon. All that compassion then comes into our hearts and we have access to reflect it into the world. Just like we make a bracha on food, so too we can make a bracha on stormy conditions and bring a healing. With confidence, we overcome accusations of being foolish and we understand we may access the mighty compassion concealed within the confusion through our emunah and trust.
May we come to understand how powerful Hashem is and how He desires a relationship with us. May we understand how complete emunah brings Simcha and embrace the truth about our relationship with Hashem and how we are made in order to perfect ourselves and reveal Hashem.