Once the inner dialogue and experience of emotions is sorted out, with emunah and Torah understanding of how Hashem wishes for us to conduct ourselves helps us to choose to remain connected to Hashem’s Will trusting that as long as we do we are doing the very most we can do for the situation, there being no better thing to do even though it might appear as though a certain action could potentially have a more direct affect. The reason is that all success is up to Hashem and even though He often gives success to things that fall far below what is His Will, it is always somehow for our ultimate training and development and eternal good. With that emunah, we never have to consciously choose to do anything out of survival instincts that is not His Will for us to do. This helps us hold our tongue and actions in the moment and cry out to Hashem to please save us from our instincts. He listens and helps.