Monthly Archives: October 2014

Integrating ideas – consciousness, free will, self-awareness, natural urges, Torah and happiness

Self-awareness and Torah are given to us in order for us to have the opportunity to choose with the real free will that consciousness presents to us to receive the immense pleasure inherent in doing mitzvahs.


In order to properly do the mitzvahs, our relationship with ourselves, others, and Hashem needs to become unmixed with the judgments and condemnations that lead us to blame, shame and condemn, which inherently have false components thereby placing us in the category of bearing false witness . Consciousness can be made more and more holy as we nullify the internal forces that attract us towards an indulgence of self-awareness as the source of happiness, generating thought speech and deed in violation of the ninth commandment, which commandment forbids us from bearing false witness against ourselves, others and Hashem. Instead Torah tells us to choose learning Torah and performing mitzvahs over the compelling natural urges that self-awareness is designed to draw our life force towards. We have real free will to choose who we are.


The happiness that self-awareness naturally seeks is not the same as the happiness that we can experience when in a conscious state of devekus, existing in a space aware of consciousness that we have self-awareness yet that self-awareness is there for the sole purpose of giving meaning to our free willed choice to acknowledge Hashem Echad, choosing to keep mitzvahs over the natural urges, out of free willed choice to recognize that His Glory is the only currency of value. Hashem alone is the cause of all and there is no other cause, despite His use of conduits and how that appears.

Transition means focusing on a role that Hashem has waited patiently for 5775 years for us to perform

What our function is in life changes as we grow.  When we are children, teens, adults, middle age, seniors – our role in life changes as a life cycle.  the time period that we are living in is shepherding us to find a functioning that may have been on the back burner for 5776 years.  That functioning is to take the role of Nishmas Am Yisrael to its fulfillment, which means being the generation undergoing a transition to the times of the Moshiach.  When a woman is in transition, her entire consciousness and physicality are involved in only one thing.  Thoughts of what to make for dinner or what to do about that grade or how to respond to that family member simply are not on the mind.  Only dealing with the pain of transition, in order to do whatever we can with Hashem’s help to give birth.

It is with this in mind that the constrictions we are experiencing, at home, in the professional world, in the social world, on college campuses, in watching the news from Israel, in the horrific stories of murder we hear….what is our functioning?  We are in transition.  The contractions are strong and coming fast.  What do we do?  When giving birth, we push.  But now, what we do is turn upwards to Hashem.  The constriction, the pain, the losses, the disappointments, the frustrations, the violations of trust….our souls see darkness and become trapped.  The constriction is a contraction and our functioning is not to focus on solving the immediate problem but rather to “send away the mother bird and keep the eggs”, releasing the trapped part of us so it can flow into Hashem’s loving thoughts of us, be encompassed in His Attributes of Mercy and restored to us,  healed and relieved of the falsity that caused it to become concealed.  Bby asking Hashem to encompass that part of our soul that has become trapped and restore it to us in a way that we can reveal His Mercy we acknowledge that happiness is not derived by worldly matters in time and space through our hand.  Happiness is the experience of the soul learning Torah, praying fervently to Hashem and emulating Him so that our actions and speech reflect Him into the world.


The end game that started with the serpent tempting Chava is to use the wisdom we have gained by exploring power, subjugation and humiliation to their final conclusion, the reality that they do not lead to happiness and that there is no happiness other than being involved with Torah, fervent prayer and emualting His Mercy.  Why?  Because Hashem fills all the worlds and is the only currency.  There is no value other than the value of Hashem.  to the degree we emulate Him, we reveal Him and thereby choose meritoriously. Chava’s mistake was that the serpent’s words became encompassed in her imagination instead of Hashem’s direction being encmpassed in her imagination without budging from it.  Every one of us faces this challenge multiple times an hour!!   We see something and our imagination suggests an explanation and our mind encompasses it and builds.  The only thing is it might be totally not true yet we believe it!!  When we do this as part of a bad pattern for years, there is a great deal of our soul trapped in that faulty place.  We are here to repair that neurocircuitry by releasing the part of us trapped there from habit, limiting belief, trauma or more.  How?  Through the gift of speech and free will, we have intention in  personal prayer requesting that we have that part of our soul restored to use in the way Hashem desires us to be, emulating Him.  We ask Hashem to please wash off the falsities and return the good use of our soul to us because we only want to reflect Torah and His Attributes of Mercy into the world


Hashem is patient.  He is all good.   He is loving.  He wants a relationship with us.  He has been willing to sit on the back burner, allowing the Shechina to be in the darkness necessary for us to have real free will. But now we are in transition.  It is now time that we, the farthest from Sinai, in the lowest generation that ever was, realize we can help fulfill the purpose for which Hashem creates the world – He desires to dwell here, through being connected to us in a relationship which He sustains us and we choose to reveal Him. To deal with transition, our focus becomes the process of uplifting our light and all the light of generations that became trapped there that led to our light becoming trapped (because we learned to believe things that might not be absolute Torah truths). Out of love with Hashem desiring Him, because of everything has has evolved in human history from the original expulsion to the destructions, the crusades, the expulsion from Spain, the pogroms, the holocaust and every other adaptation absorbed by the psyche of our people,- we potentially uplift all that preceded us too, for we learn from it and that contributes to our ability to take on the role of transition and there is only one Jewish soul, we are all one.  We cannot indulge natural  thinking no matter how justifiable  about our subjective realities in detail. Rather we have to think about the light that is being drawn to become added to what is trapped in pain and turn our eyes to Hashem and ask Him to absorb it instead into the Ein sof and return ALL of it to us so we can reveal His good. Tolerating insults, overlooking faults, bearing the burden of confusion of mind, forgiving and casting sins into the sea.

Just as  a tree converts carbon dioxide to oxygen but it is not the function that we see of a tree, so too this spiritual function is not how we traditionally have thought about ourselves, as personalities, with roles and circumstances.  Transition means we get focused on the reality of what a soul is sent here to do, which is to uplift light so that Hashem’s purposes are accomplished.  That means taking our pain and momentarily realizing that we have a unique opportunity and role to heal the soul of Nishmas Am Yisrael by flowing the light so it can dissolve into the Ein Sof, become encompassed in His Love and returned to us.

We can turn our hearts into mikvahs and heal beyond what we can imagine.  As far as the triggering circumstances, Hashem is very big.  He only does Good.  Whatever He does is good.  Our job is effort.  Here is a Torah guide.
Women may join our workgroup

utterances commandments side by side 5 and 5

utterances commandments side by side 5 and 5_Page_1

Sforno Bereshis Chava

4th and 9th commandments with fire water wind and earth

4th to 9th fire water wind earth