Elul 5774 to prepare for Tishrei 5775 Cheshbon Chart
Teshuva means return.When speaking about return we are speaking about the state we were in before we were born.Your soul at that time has to make an oath, be righteous and don’t be wicked, we swear to turn those circumstances as the backdrop to being.
Happiness is the byproduct of living up to this promise,to livef or reflecting into the world Torah values and Hashem’s Attributes of Mercy.Lovingly and gently complete the chart belowto discover two or three areas that show a pattern of swirling emotions that have yet to produce real happiness in your life.
|Segment Of time By decade||What happened during this period of my life. Try to remember all the events, tragedies,simchas. Life situations||How did I respond? What did I do in response to these things?||From where I am today,not where I was then when I might have made the best possible choices, which of my choices got me closer to where I want to be in life and which got me further. Identify where the choices got you||Say, and this is crucial, what was I thinking and feeling when I made the good choices and what was I thinking and feeling when I made the bad choices.We will see our patterns, like insecurity , fear,afraid of rejection, desire,impulsivityThis is the swirling -we want to separate out tzelem elokim from being drawn towards the vortex of doubt to destruction||Your feelings and thoughts reveal your motivators, deep from within. It is not necessary important to understand why your middos are the way they are, some from birth,from environment, habit, choices. That doesn’t matter. As a wise man says, it may be my fault but it is your problem. You have to deal with your middos as they are, which cause your deeds.Teshuva is about middos, if you make it about deeds it is about cutting weeds without roots. Have a visualization of how you wish things were The sole goal of seeing the fault is to bring ourselves to a new free will point to make choices that return happiness to avodas Hashem and in that effort create positive influence|
Even if the world says you are a tzaddik feel in your eyes as a rasha.The feeling of being finished is a breach of this oath.Return to feeling unfinished and let it bring you into being a tzaddik. As long as we are alive, we are empowered to bring nourishment to the universe through our effort to bring deeper places within our subconscious into conscious service of Hashem.
From the chart above, distill for the year’s goals the ideas to here:
Spiritual goals for 5775
For daily review to keep in consciousness through verbal introspection
What I need to fix:
How to bring these two core objectives into daily life:
Ideally the happiness I would like to actualize by the end of the year is:
women are invited to join a learning group for elul – see www.beyondanydoubts.com/elul/